Ch. 12 Engaging the Grace We Imagine

As you are all aware, it was as she was writing this chapter, that Judy was diagnosed with cancer. She wrote, ” As of right now, I find no comfort in any belief. What does sustain me is what I know to be true- perhaps not the ultimate truth, but my truth, what I know in my heart. ” I know love, and love never seeks to separate or exclude. I know freedom, and freedom never lets ego and fear have the final say. I know I am not alone, that we are all connected in the web of life, and we feel the connection most powerfully when we operate within a Field of Compassion”.

As I witnessed Judy’s life, I can tell you that she loved what she did. She loved learning, she loved writing, and she loved being able to meet many of you as she traveled and gave workshops. What I also know is that she lived life to the fullest. In my observation , the spark in Judy came from knowing that all she needed to know came from within. The more she was “within”, the more of her consciousness expanded to a point she realized the true essence of who she was. Through the practice of meditation her consciousness expanded and she knew the amazing reality of which  she was a part and her connection to all that is. I experienced Judy’s mystic journey being alive with that reality.

Even with the diagnosis of cancer Judy was able to live in the moment. She was able to take the stance of witness, the ability to allow herself to be in the present moment and allow life to unfold.

Judy is asking me to look within to discover who I am and where  I came from, to what am I a part. She is asking me to take an active role in co-creating with the universe by also going “within” to know myself and the connection I have to all that is. She is asking me to live in the moment and allow life to unfold. A few weeks before her death, she looked me in the eye and told me her transition was in process. She told me to go out and live my life, to live life to the fullest. I believe she is asking all of us to find the true essence of who we are and to live life in the fullest.

Judy began her next book not knowing if she would ever finish it. She did not, but it was life-giving and she needed to try. It was going to be called The Quantum Mystic: Reflections on Being Human. In the first chapter she reflected on her diagnosis of cancer as a time when she had been holding on to the branch of life- and the branch gave away which placed her in a state of “free fall”. She wrote, “Those who choose to live life reflectively often look back at moments in life when their customary support gave way and they began a free-fall with nothing to cushion what appeared to be the inevitable impact. In retrospect these experiences are frequently the most grace-filled moments of life, birthing new insights and revealing emergent capacities that unleash life-giving energy and unprecedented creativity. Primary fear gives way to expanded consciousness and fearless empowerment. The dreadful dying gives over to an unexpected naissance, the rising up of a new consciousness that far surpasses the old”.

I believe Judy may want us to reflect on this paragraph. When did we have an experience of our “life holding branch” give way? How did it feel? What impact is it having on our lives?  I believe Jude was writing that paragraph for me as she has left and I have been clinging on as I am in “free fall”. I want you all to know that during first few months during “free fall” I was paralyzed. But, grace-filled moments arose, life changing energy arrived and with the grace of the Most Holy and Judy’s presence, I have taken steps on a new journey. I am beginning to look within to find myself and life again has begun to bloom.

This is the last chapter. I would like to thank all of you for allowing me to take this journey with you. Let me know your thoughts going forward. Any suggestions or comments will be appreciated. I am planning on beginning Radical Amazement the first Saturday in February, the 4th. My personal email address is:

I will be sending a notice out that morning. This will give us all a chance to catch our breath and invite those who may want to follow this blog.

The action this week is to reflect on a time in our life when life’s branch gave way and we were in”free fall”. It would be interesting to hear all of these stories. I believe it would be uplifting.

I thought I was finished with this writing but today I felt Judy’s presence and there was more to the message. It may be time for some changes. Life is short and it will vanish as quick as a blink of an eye. But we are here and we have life today so lets do it, lets live life to the fullest. Think about what that means! LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST. It may be time to dream. It may be time to look at our life and become all that we dream. It may be time for all of us to wake up and yes, yes,  become who we are ment to be. Lets go for it! As we become the creation we were ment to be, the planet will respond and newness will arise. Before the year is out, lets look at our life, lets embrace the change what ever it might be. I heard a saying that said “champions are born and then unmade”. The message is , its time to go back to our birth, and see who we were ment to be. Once again, I look forward to a Radically Amazing year as we continue our journey in February.

Thank You,


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6 Responses to Ch. 12 Engaging the Grace We Imagine

  1. rita petruziello says:

    Phil you write beautifully. Thank you for keeping Judy’s memory alive for all of us and also her message of realizing the interconnectedness of all creation and the love that holds it all together.
    I am looking forward to having Brian Swimme with us on in June for the dedication of Judy’s library at River’s Edge. This library will be a source or great wisdom and inspiration for many. We look forward to having you, your family and Judy’s many friends join us the evening of June 30, 2012.

    • Carmel Higgins says:

      I would be interested in donating copies of my own book, Cosmic Fire Local Sparks: My Journey into the Universe Story, to Judy’s library. If someone knows where I can send it please let me know. My email address is

  2. Betty Carpentier says:

    Thanks, Phil, for these 12 weeks of motivation to read and pray with “Field of Compassion.” You have written so well from your own prayerful experience.
    Thanks also to all who have entered their comments.

  3. kimmanleyort says:

    I too have enjoyed re-reading Field of Compassion along with you and everyone else here. It is a phenomenal book and your reflections were inspiring.

    Will you continue with Radical Amazement?

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